Living in Toulouse, France, Moroccan-Spanish author Laila Karrouch turns to books as soon as she finishes her hospital duties. A nursing assistant by profession, she sees literature as a space for introspection and transcendence. Born in the Nador region to a conservative family and raised in Vic, Catalonia, she discovered her passion for writing in 2004, a pursuit that has allowed her to reconcile the personal with the social. At the age of eight, Laila Karrouch left her native Nador to join her mother and siblings in Spain as part of a family reunification. Disoriented in Catalonia, she experienced the move as a real uprooting, compounded by the language barrier and cultural shock. She grew up in Vic, about sixty kilometers from Barcelona, where immigrant children were few. Torn between the conservative upbringing of her family and her desire to thrive through what she learned at school, she took refuge in books, books she often had to hide from her parents. Now a novelist alongside her work as a caregiver, Laila Karrouch recalls that «developing her autonomy as a young girl in the 1980s, coming from a conservative background, was a silent, daily struggle». «My mother was reluctant to let me stay in school after a certain age. I had to do my homework in secret, read away from prying eyes, and practice the athletics I loved so much at school, but without competing in national tournaments. Every summer vacation was marked by uncertainty about whether I'd be allowed to return to school in the fall», she told Yabiladi. Writing as a means of self-discovery After graduating from high school, Laila once again faced a dilemma: whether to become a mother or continue her studies to build a future for herself. «I did both, and it was difficult to reconcile. But my husband supported me in training as a caregiver. My mother, however, believed that at a certain age, one should marry and have children», she recalls. «My parents came from a background where they thought this was the way to protect their children, especially the girls. But in reality, it created a lot of frustration. Only later did I begin to understand that my father had emigrated to give us a better future», she explains. Through knowledge, Laila sought to reflect on her dual culture, on the possibility of reconciling the two worlds in which she grew up. Divorced and a mother of two, she began this process during her first pregnancy by keeping a journal. «I started writing to express all my frustration. I wanted to understand my life, to love myself, to share my story with myself», she says. From this exercise emerged her book From Nador to Vic (Columna CAT), published in 2004. This creative process also allowed her to better understand the complexity of her journey as well as her parents' choices. «It taught me to forgive, to rise above the anger I felt toward my family and the host society, which only perceived us through the injunction to adapt, even if it meant giving up one culture for another», she confides. «I lived eight years in Morocco and grew up in Spain, where I spent 35 years of my life. But despite that, I was never considered Spanish enough in Spain or Moroccan enough in Morocco», she reflects. These thoughts underpin her first book, which, beyond its literary success, also helped mend family ties. «My father didn't know about the book's release. He didn't believe his colleagues when they congratulated him, saying I was a writer and had been on television. When he asked me about it after coming home from work, I admitted I had published a book telling our story. When he read it, my father burst into tears. I think from that moment on, he truly began to know me for the first time». Rebuilding personal ties and enriching cultural diversity At the crossroads of intimate reflection and cultural diversity shaped by migration, Laila Karrouch believes that «each book requires energy drawn from within». «I don't think I can change the world, but I can change my world, my surroundings. I think I've managed to do that, little by little», she says with pride. For her, this is the true power of literature and personal testimony. In that sense, she considers each female literary contribution in Morocco and the Arab world as part of a «virtuous circle» that is deeply inspiring. Through writing, she has found her path to gratitude. «I am proud of my parents today because they wanted to protect me in their own way. I am also proud to have a job, to have pursued my studies, to be able to write my story and share it with others, and to be a mother», she emphasizes. Embracing this lifeline in literature, she published her novel Laila (L'Asino d'oro) in 2020. Between her first two books, she also published children's stories, and her biographical work was even adapted into a series. Now living in Toulouse, France, for the past seven years, she says she wants to devote more and more time to writing. For her, it's a way to address these themes in all their complexity, through the prism of her own experiences. «It's my story, but I later realized it was also the story of many other girls and women with dual cultures», she says. «What I have learned through writing, and with age, is that I don't need validation from anyone, as long as I can accept myself, despite prejudice, criticism from all sides, and racism. Today, I want to write to tell my story, but also to tell young binational women that they can become what they dream of being, while embracing both cultures, being reconciled with themselves, and proud to be both Moroccan and Spanish». «When I see female writers in the Arab world, especially in Morocco, I feel proud. I am also proud of women who excel in all other fields», Laila Karrouch says. Her works are now available in Catalan, Spanish, and Italian, and she hopes to see them published in other languages as well.
